Episode 2.5: That Felt Good….

The guys discuss the Epic Beatdown of Western Michigan, and what it means.  Our expert attends sporting events and music festivals to escape his daily grind of photographic bikini models.  And we look ahead to Minnesota, and the battle for Floyd.

Five Stages of Hawkeye Grief

Wake me up when we get to Stage 5.

1.  Denial:
We have a Senior QB and some young talent at RB.  Our WR had comparable junior-year stats as DJK and Marvin.  Our TE is a beast that can’t be covered. Running game looks serviceable.  We beat NIU, sure it was close but they are a top MAC school. Coach Ferentz is great at developing young players er… known for leading disciplined teams that don’t have mental break downs…um..adaptive and able to rapidly adjust schemes to fit the game situation…uh…a really nice guy.

2.  Anger:
Iowa F***ing State?  Are you f***ing kidding me!?  Defense takes Steele Jantz out of the game for 3 quarters and the Offense can’t pick up a f***ing first down?  Does KF have any friends or family members that went to ISU, because he sure doesn’t act like this game matters.

3. Bargaining:
Remember 2002? We can lose to ISU and still have a great season.  The young defense is looking good, and things are improving on offense.  UNI is a good FCS school, look what they did to Wisconsin.  And if we sacrifice two more RBs on the His altar, then AIRBHG will leave Mark Weisman alone.

4.  Depression:
Michigan Directional.  F*** f*** f***.  Weisman rushes for 200+ yds and 3 TDs and we still can’t beat a Michigan Directional. Late in the 4th with the game on the line, defense collapsed ala 2011 (and 2010…).  Mental breakdowns on ST give Iowa the only net negative percentage for recovering onside kicks in NCAA history.  2013 verbal commits are saying some scary things on Twitter.  And Big Ten play opens next week…..

5.  Acceptance:
We suck.  Really, this team is terrible.  Definitely 2007 bad. Maybe 1999 bad.  Except for the minor-league NFL team in Columbus, the Big Ten is a walking disaster this year.  And we are below average even for that group.  Eight more weeks of this debacle before Nebraska puts us out of our misery.  Things might improve next year, but we need to keep everyone healthy and in school.  So not likely.


12 Saturdays Podcast: Week 1

2012:  A New Hope.

It is a dark time for Iowa Football.

While the Recruiting Cheats and Pederasts have been disgraced, the forces of Evil remain strong in the Legends Division.

A group of brave Freedom Fighters, led by a senior quarterback, has established a new Secret Base where the fabled Hayden Bubble once stood…..